My mind has a mind of its own! It most certainly does.. It never stops
talking and that second track that mostly sings.. But what do you do when your
mind doesn't stop singing and playing antakshri.. when you try hard to make it stop
and tell it to allow you to sleep but it won't... Forget it, I've told 'stop'
to myself often enough and after all what worst
can happen. Well nothing I can think of for sure... And what is the best that can
happen. Hey, I can win an Antakshri competition for sure. The last thoughts in
your mind before you sleep turn into dreams and often return to you in the
morning when you wake. Thoughts during the day build up into a chatter in your
mind and it's all that anxiety, fear, unanswered questions, confusion,
judgment, etc. they say.... In my case it's just not any of this because there
is no one to judge, no fears, no confusion. I am retired and free to do as I
please so then what??
So how do I stop talking to myself or singing that song over and over and over again..... should
I tell my mind to wander elsewhere, perhaps start solving word puzzles (which I
do) or meditate or turn to spirituality to calm my racing over active mind. Did
I say meditate? Did I say turn to spirituality? Let me quote something I wrote
in my book YOUNG AND SIXTY (do pick a copy!!) and it's just about me with due
respect to others.
"My friends often suggest I consider yoga, art of
living, meditation and I would like to think that it is my spiritual growth
they are talking about. I definitely make it a point to strike them off my
friends list, if they just mean to say, "you are old now and so you
should". Some of us see it as a spiritual journey that should begin, while
some prefer to journey into the past and reflect about what is still to come. As
the years pass, a fear of the unknown grows stronger by the day and we begin to
lean on God. If it were really possible to talk
to God today, what would you say to Him and would He even bother to listen? I
do not know what you feel about this but I am a firm believer in talking to God.
I fight with him too on a regular basis and I firmly believe that he listens to
me. Yet for someone like me who believes
in the power of prayer, I still can't see myself meditating or sitting in silence."
Then when I am singing or talking to God, is it because of stress. Let
me quote my thoughts from my book yet again...
"The only way to handling stress
is perhaps to control that wandering and over imaginative mind. It is not at
all easy, because mine never stops talking to me even when I lay my head on my
pillow at night. I keep running over conversations in my head and in the
morning I find myself remembering all the conversations that I have had and
with whom. I can be a little nuts at times, but that’s fine by me as it is not
impacting how I feel or behave. Talking to myself is actually my way of clearing
my cobwebs. I love talking to myself and in fact it helps me write my stories
and scripts better too."
Google search says that psychologists believe they have figured out
exactly why certain songs tend to stick in our heads more than others. The
phenomenon according to them is called 'involuntary musical imagery' more commonly
known as “earworms.” .... Earworms????? Oh yes, I do most certainly have loads of
those keedas in my head, but
they are mostly about getting out there, having fun and making new friends and memories. Then
it is also said that singing and talking to yourself isn't just normal but it
is good for your mental health too... That's good the hear. So I guess I am okay looking at things
differently, making up weird questions and think up even weirder answers to
that in my head. Again quoting from my book... Well, I have written one so why not?.. and it has all these thoughts on living life in the now, so yeah, why not? Have you ever tried having mental fights with people who make you miserable. I advise you to do that. I do that all the time,
especially when I don't want to argue standing there and then with that
irrational person. I just simply go home, have these big mental fights in my
head with that person in my mind at night. I know that if I did that face to
face, it might make it worst, so it's just me and my mind arguing it out with
that person in my head till I am spent.... and soon I find myself letting go
and then it just does not matter anymore.
I love to meet people, make friends, love to touch hearts and keep on
wandering to seize more opportunities on the way. So what's up with me and
what's my mind up to? Should I be worried? I thinknot for I think I've got it. We are just happy talking and singing together
to release this too much energy I have these days after retirement.... With a
mix of singing and talking....arguments and decisions... I think we are doing just
fine. There is nothing wrong with my mind having a mind of its own.... AND ofcourse my heart has a heart of its own too, but that is another story....
.................and
so it's time for that dramatic moment overused phrase
in movies I'd like to say to you, "If anyone has any objections, speak now or forever hold your peace".
