My friends, the change makers..giving hope!!

Opening newspaper in the morning is getting scarier by the day for most. Greed, protests, intolerance and acts of hatred, abetment to suicide, murder, molestation, missing paintings, confusing justice!  Forget natural calamity- that’s something we can’t do much about but just look at negative news, one after another, about insensitive humans being thrown at us. It's a very disturbing trend. Some of these headlines in the social space make you nauseous and wonder what’s happening to society and people around us.

Is there no good news to share anymore at all? Is there no Hope?  Things seem to be falling apart in everything around us. A few days back, I get a whats-app message that says “If you take into consideration all the signs, there is no mistaking that we are living our last days and its the end of time. Surrender to the Lord.".. but where is the Lord. I thought he resided in my heart- so what next? I hate negativity and often wonder why people share messages of doom instead of hope.

So I decided, I am going to take you on a walk into the realm of hope as there is a lot of it still out there. It is in fact, I realised, right next to me in my own little world. Call them by any fancy name - activists, leaders or change makers but for me they are just my friends who give selflessness and hope a whole new meaning altogether. Let me introduce you to some of my very own awesome change makers, I call friends.

RJ Anirudh Chawla, Big FM, who saved a life by landing up at a suicidal listener’s home after receiving a call and feeling uneasy about it. Prerana Langa, Yes Foundation, spreading the hope of social change and smiles through 'Yes I am the Change' films. Shivani Khetan who started Expresso Café with a simple thought and simple beginning of getting people to share their life experiences over a cup of coffee and coming forward to inspire others. 

Then there is my unassuming shy friend Dipesh Tank who found a woman lying covered in filth with burn injuries and helped her get back to a life of dignity. He undertakes school book drive for a village and runs to the rescue of citizens in need of help at the drop of a hat.  The dedicated Sailesh Mishra with his Silver Innings Foundation and a vision is to increase the involvement of senior citizens and enhance their dignity in the community apart from working relentlessly in the field of Dementia and Alzheimer. 

Then there is Indrani Ray (and a bit of me, too) of Arunima women’s forum to interact and exchange thoughts on issues concerning women in the Lokhandwala Complex area; Remila Puravankara, Taksheel Foundation, working to educate slum children and adults  in the age group of 5yrs to 40yrs coming from neighbouring areas of Lokhandwala Complex; Ramaa Subramaniam creator of Silver Innings Helpline, first of its kind one-stop portal for seniors & Pride Club;  Anita & Anand Gurnani of '50young' bringing new adventures and learning into lives of the 50+, Raheen JJ of NGO ‘Open your Arms' healing psycho-social problems faced by children; Bindu Bhonsle working for development of the less fortunate and in need; Sona Kumar of Sona Sarovar Trust improving the living condition in the rural areas through water conservation, employment, education, health, awareness; Sapna Bhavnani involved in women empowerment projects and working for the upliftment of women and children. 

There are so many more of my friends working for education, environment, girl child, etc. In fact in every field that we begin to think is eroding and losing hope. I can go on and on taking their names. Thankfully, even though the morning paper makes me wonder each day, I am really never depressed at all and neither have I lost hope at all because I am personally already walking the path with most of them  and blessed to be around them.  After all it is up to us, isn't it, to go out there and make good things happen around us. 

Besides, when push comes to shove and things seem dark, I know for sure that  there is loads of goodness in all of us and a wonderful group of my friends out there, happy to do the good deed. I know there is Hope and true caring people that deserve a big salute.

Be the beacon of light in someone's darkness....

Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile

Tolerance, Intolerance and Me

Tolerance ..... Intolerance...a never ending debate. So what is tolerance?It is just the willingness to tolerate those opinions or behavior that one just does not like or agree with. Do I have a right to talk about tolerance and intolerance when I myself first am unable to tolerate a lot of things and can’t tolerate some in my own home and surroundings forget as far as the things happening in the country….and yes it does disturb me when things happen in the country but let me just share my thoughts.

There is a long personal list of likes and dislikes or as we call it tolerance and intolerance now….I can’t tolerate the attitude of the women who claim we Andherites can’t travel in a Virar local.  I made the cardinal sin of getting into one and standing near the door and at Dadar became the target of intolerance.  I was threatened that Andheri would not be by destination and she promised to take me to Virar.  I don’t know what part of me rose to the occasion but all I did was say “No problem at all, take me to Virar. I will come home with you have a cup of tea and take a train back”...and the laughter that filled the air defused the situation. Not only was I patted on the back but respectfully allowed to get off at my destination……small mercies….

I can't tolerate the sound of the pigeon on my window each morning (need an air gun badly)....I can't tolerate hypocrites and discrimination....people wasting their precious time and talent......grumblers....the double parking in my Lokhandwala Complex (but who cares...and yes I tried ..but rule says if driver in car - can't be towed)....and hey am I not tolerating the sometimes utterly stupid things people in my life do... wet blankets are wet blankets no matter what.....and I even have actors, films I like and dislike ...So if I say I don’t like an actor, I am allowed to say so na without being bashed or pulled up for it!  I have been waiting for that actor to stop spreading his arms out to the sky leaning over to one side or going hmmm mmmmmm while my intolerance screams out Sholay ka famous dialogue "yeh haath mujhe de de thakur".  Everyone has a tolerance level within then, and well that’s just how much I can take from him. This is just one simple immediate thing that upsets me and aggravates me so what can I say about things larger than life that are happening? Yes, I can't tolerate a lot of things happening in my neighborhood, my workplace and of course our country too...

Do we really live in a society that allows us to do what we want our way and express our opinions freely. There are norms and guidelines that need to be followed at home, workplace, etc. much to my like or dislike.  Take the simple example above about the actor and I can tell you that I lost many a friends on that one joking comment. There are so many voices out there vehemently expressing their views and saying how can you say such a thing when the whole world swears by his talent. But hey, it is just that one thing I can’t tolerate. Did I say I don’t like all of his work or that all of his films don’t work for me? Matter closed and here starts my pent up intolerance and given one little opportunity I become the first vocal voice in that intolerance movement.  That according to me is just what is happening around us.  People who are unable to express their views freely and made to shut up are the ones that look for opportunities to express when an opportunity appears. The burst of pent up emotions and thoughts then flow faster than the largest river of India.  

Issues that can change the face of the earth, our surroundings and are for our good definitely need to be supported. Movements that don’t allow me to eat what I want, wear what I want, speak the way I want (so long as it is sensible) are not to be tolerated because they are our fundamental rights. Aren’t they? Then it becomes my choice to live with it or protest. We are a democracy and in a country with so many different cultures and so many different languages that it is quite impossible for all of us to walk the same path.

What is this about “how dare you criticize the country that has given you so much?” So am I just supposed to take everything that makes me uncomfortable sitting down. Rather a silly thought because everything in life is based on an individual thought or a personal experience and that is something that matters a lot.  It has nothing to do with what others feel but just if this experience or thought matches the mob, then need I say more. I have a right to my view and it is up to the other to accept or disregard it. On the other hand, I am of the strong opinion that people in power; people whose words matter, people who are looked up to have to be extra careful with their words. Of course, they have the right to feel hurt and angry but somewhere along the line, I feel, that is way past for them, as they now shoulder the responsibility of being mentors, and idols to many and every word they say matters.

Changes and improvements are necessary. I can't tolerate a lot of things happening in our country too. I just heard that Delhi plans to allow cars to ply on roads based on their numbers - odd and even- and on particular days only. Is that the solution of traffic control? Good thought but what if I have an emergency, what if I am going to work daily by car. Please don’t say car pool, as no one’s working hours match with another and people don’t have time to wait for one another after all everyone has to get home to children, etc.  How is it going to help? The smart ones will find a way around it. Stupid me also will buy one car with odd and one with even number. Problem solved or increased? So now if this is enforced in my city will I accept it? Will I grumble? Will I be tolerant or intolerant? I need to think seriously about it.